when she holds back her tears
this morning, I switched on my pc and a new mail conversation alert popped up.
I immediately logged in my gmail and read the mail.
and now, I'm just holding back my tears.
it took a person who is millions of miles away to make me smile, feel like I wanted to cry, and look deep inside.
it took a person who is millions of miles away to make me realise something.
in the search of love.
I forgot one thing.
I forgot to love myself.
at first I've decided, if I love myself too much, it'll lead to vanity. and I won't be humble anymore. so I've become selfless. and forgot to love myself.
I realised, there are people who does love me. and if I don't love myself, then I would disappoint the faith of love people have thrusted upon me.
thanks. to you. I really love you too. this morning, after reading your mail, I really in need of a hug and a warm comforting smile. but all I see is the desktop monitor. it is warm and comforting, but its not you. its not Farah. its not Enni. its not you.
On the more larger scale, okay, there's the Thaipusam parade happening where they carry kavadi and stuff. I know I have very very limited knowledge in this. (zewt, isn't deepavali a celebration when the gods won in the battle of good over evil? I didn't know its a new year on the deepavali calendar.) So, it is interesting and pretty amazing to see a whole Indian race, the Hindus in particular, gather, and walk together, regardless social class (I don't think they still practice the caste system here right? anyone please update me on this).
But on the downside, good god (I mean my god), the terrible congestion is just friggin ridiculous I have to say. I was stucked for an hour on jalan kuching since 6.30am to 7.30am. No, I'm not making a racial comment, its just mere citizenship issues. And to add to it, some Indians who had to work, was also a bit moody on the road, hence a couple of deadly stares was received by yours truly. jeezzz!!!
tomorrow is going to be a more bloody day on the road, I should just stick to where the chinese and malays and other races live probably. well, maybe becos the parades other races have usually done at dataran merdeka only. not the entire jalan ipoh-jalan kuching-batu caves. thats a LONG stretch I tell ya!!!
be careful, wise and smart on the road ya people!
.
I immediately logged in my gmail and read the mail.
and now, I'm just holding back my tears.
it took a person who is millions of miles away to make me smile, feel like I wanted to cry, and look deep inside.
it took a person who is millions of miles away to make me realise something.
in the search of love.
I forgot one thing.
I forgot to love myself.
at first I've decided, if I love myself too much, it'll lead to vanity. and I won't be humble anymore. so I've become selfless. and forgot to love myself.
I realised, there are people who does love me. and if I don't love myself, then I would disappoint the faith of love people have thrusted upon me.
thanks. to you. I really love you too. this morning, after reading your mail, I really in need of a hug and a warm comforting smile. but all I see is the desktop monitor. it is warm and comforting, but its not you. its not Farah. its not Enni. its not you.
On the more larger scale, okay, there's the Thaipusam parade happening where they carry kavadi and stuff. I know I have very very limited knowledge in this. (zewt, isn't deepavali a celebration when the gods won in the battle of good over evil? I didn't know its a new year on the deepavali calendar.) So, it is interesting and pretty amazing to see a whole Indian race, the Hindus in particular, gather, and walk together, regardless social class (I don't think they still practice the caste system here right? anyone please update me on this).
But on the downside, good god (I mean my god), the terrible congestion is just friggin ridiculous I have to say. I was stucked for an hour on jalan kuching since 6.30am to 7.30am. No, I'm not making a racial comment, its just mere citizenship issues. And to add to it, some Indians who had to work, was also a bit moody on the road, hence a couple of deadly stares was received by yours truly. jeezzz!!!
tomorrow is going to be a more bloody day on the road, I should just stick to where the chinese and malays and other races live probably. well, maybe becos the parades other races have usually done at dataran merdeka only. not the entire jalan ipoh-jalan kuching-batu caves. thats a LONG stretch I tell ya!!!
be careful, wise and smart on the road ya people!
.
Labels: sharing is caring
posted by *cosmic freak* @ 8:05 AM
2 Comments:
At 5:05 PM, January 31, 2007 ,
DareDevil8 said...
i am not an indian,so i stand corrected with my comment.
just my observation,as i have lotta indian acquaintances.although the caste system is not rigidly followed here but i do hear lotta comments,more of a ego booster to shore up their share price by refering to their caste proudly.anyone can claim anything in malaysia as they do not have an ID on it.ANYWAY i am not interested.
some of them even defended the caste system,telling me how it systematically ensure social order.lame,lame,lame indeed.
the Indian Gov. is embarking on correcting this injustice and the Harijan have hope for the future.
At 11:06 AM, February 01, 2007 ,
Azer Mantessa said...
what a day :-)
cud not enter klang today so had to call in-laws ... sowwie ... traffic is horrrible and we can't get thru ... cya on wkends ...
my lame excuse of cos :D
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