a reflection

"I do think when you fall in love, there's no more gender, no more age, no more race, nor religion issues come on the surface. Its a question of heart, of how much love. Thus, love is blind, and can make you go crazy. You're willing to kill and die. Thats love. And you can feel the same love for everyone, your dad, your mom, your spouse and your siblings. Thats love. For those who understands it. Not for the sake of being with someone. But for those magical moment that makes you cry and smile from your heart."

I wrote this on the Facebook's Social Moth application. It was written anonymously at first, but now, I thought it should be shared before I leave the year to step into a new one.


No, this is not a new year resolution post. Think is just something to reflect the fantastic emotional journey I have had throughout the year.


Falling in love with three person. The Sun. The Moon. and Loneliness.


Trying new things. Photography. Events Management. Public Relations.


Meeting great respectable leaders. And being inspired by them.


I might not been to places as much as everyone else. But at least in my cosmic abyss, I've created a borderless world of thoughts.


I've loved people beyond my capabilities, I've loved until it hurts, and I've been loved. But when you have reached the peak of Love, you have become skeptical on other's ability in loving. And you become unjust in your decisions.


Because you have loved until it hurts, its hard to know how deserving you are for other love coming your way.


But aside from all that, its fun to know that come new year, I'm uplifted with new spirits, aspired to reach my goals and inspired to write and fulfill my dream plans. I have directions and I know that I'm walking towards it slowly.


There's so many things that I look forward to next year. Travel. Soul-searching. and write and write more. So many little projects I've constructed in my mind. This little brain of mine have too many post-its stamped on it.


Tonight, there are no big celebration in plans. No hu-ha with the rest of the world. A small family gathering. Will take more photos of Opah (my dad's mother). Its fun to listen to her stories. I miss ma'tok (my mom's mother) who refuses to stay or even come down to KL for a few days to be with us. I also hope next year I can go back to Kelantan and visit her. Yes, another train ride.


End of January, me and my girl Ibah will be hitting the railway tracks, heading upnorth with our bodyguard (hehehe) for a weekend re-treat, bagpacking, island-hopping, ciggies, books, photography, conversations, coffees and soul-searching in Langkawi.


No, thats not a resolution. Just a plan. Not even a reflection. We'll reflect there. While brushing our feets on the sandy beach of Pantai Chenang.